Down for the holidays

I've been sad lately. I don't know why exactly. Last week I blamed PMS. This week, I just don't have an excuse.

Maybe it's work. I've been pretty busy lately, absorbed with my Spanish-speaking client. I feel so powerless to help her. I don't know the first thing about how I could get her a work visa, or even an under-the-table job in the meantime. I've spent my evening worrying about her getting to the health department tomorrow for a doctor's appointment without me. I suspect a lot of my co-workers think I need to just chill out, but I can't even explain how absolutely responsible I feel for her. I know once she passes along, whether it be on to bigger and better things, or even back to the bad situation she left, I'll stop thinking about her, and it will feel as though a big weight is lifted. But for now, I worry.

Maybe it's family. The closer I get to seeing them, the harder it is to be away. Already I'm worried about what it will be like to leave them again--Chicago too.