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Friday, December 02, 2005

I dreamed about him again

The boy I was madly in love with from age eight to thirteen.

The one who was my lab partner in eighth grade.

Who went to the same church my family joined.

The boy who was killed in a car accident just shy of his 21st birthday.

I dream about him occasionally. Infrequently. In my dreams, we are much closer than we were in life, though one of my last encounters with him was when he and his friends crashed a party at my house, and we did a drunken duet of "Dust in the Wind," so I'm glad in the end, we were friends.

In my dreams, we're always good friends or lovers. It pleases me greatly to have such positive dreams, because in my experience, the times I want or need good dreams are usually the times I end up in a nightmare.

But anyway, in the beginning, we interacted in a very snippy way (the whole "if a boy teases you, it means he likes you" thing), but I think I made a conscious switch to dream about a contemporary interaction, to act the way I would around a boyfriend right now. Weird. --to make a conscious choice in dreaming, because I've never been able to do that. (At most, I can sometimes wake myself up out of a nightmare if I don't want it to continue.)

So it was just a little, lovely dream. It's a really wonderful way to remember him.


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