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Wednesday, February 09, 2005

I hate salesmen

Period. No salesman will ever sway my mind about a product, no matter how hard he tries. Particularly how hard he tries, because I think it's pretty disrespectful to not believe I know my own mind.

I know that's their job, but still.

I reserve my most supreme hatred for the magazine sellers who haunted my college campus. Though I have already stated my hate for people trying to sell me things, what bothers me more is when they try to disguise that they're just plain selling something. But since I haven't been in school for a while now, I didn't recognize it when it knocked on my door last night.

First it was "I'm introducing myself to all the cool neighbors." Then it was, "I'm in a speech class, and I have to meet 500 people to get over the fear of public speaking. How am I doing?"

"My class is having a contest."

"If I'm the first to meet 500 people, they'll send me to Rome, Paris, London . . ."

He emoted, gestured, and hammed his way through his monologue (well done, I'll admit, for I didn't suspect anything until he brushed off my "what are you selling?" with a "C.P.A. That stands for Cuteness, Personality, and Attitude."), and didn't get to the point for about 10 minutes. Finally he pulled out his list of magazine subscriptions. Tried to guilt me with a "but you can buy a subscription for the children's hospital!"

And he tried to sway me with, "It's cheap and easy! Just like my ex-girlfriend!"

Who says shit like that to women they don't know? But it was a wonderful opportunity to shut the door in his face after saying, "You lost me with that joke."

I hate people.


Blogger erin said...


8:59 AM  
Blogger mojobeans said...

The worst! Do they really think I'm that stupid? Yeah. They do.

And that joke? Jeez.

12:35 PM  
Blogger joolz said...

Every time I hear about those magazine sellers, I think of that scene in Office Space. And then I laugh. Relevant? Perhaps. Funny? Absolutely.

I've never had anyone selling magazines come to my house.

2:26 PM  
Blogger Megan said...

I love my security door. I hear a "Hi, was wondering if I could--" and I release the "listen" button and go back to my business.

8:46 AM  

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